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Published: August 28 2012

Buzz Fleischman - Columnist Page.It’s only natural that we name our children, our pets and our cars. We name our teams, our bands and our fraternity houses. If you have enough money or influence, we’ll name a stadium, a museum or a public building after you.

What’s the name of our moon? Answer: the moon! It doesn’t have a name.

Have you noticed that every moon revolving around a planet in our solar system has a name? Ours doesn’t. Where have we gone wrong? We name everything around here. We even name stars we can’t see. Founded in 1979, the International Star Registry has sold over 1 million of their full-color "Name a Star" parchment certificates. That’s over $50 million worth of something they can’t touch and you can’t see.

Figuring there are between 400 billion and 1 trillion stars in this galaxy alone, selling names for them at over $50 each would approach the amount of our national debt. Of course that would never work because there are more stars than people.

If those with big egos name as many stars as they want, that means trump buys out the foreseeable universe.

But there’s a hitch.  International Star Registry doesn't have a legitimate license to name stars. Robert Naeye, editor of Mercury Magazine, a publication of the Astronomical Society of the Pacific, says "The star names sold by the International Star Registry are not recognized by any professional astronomical organization." The International Astronomical Union is the only scientific body authorized to name astronomical bodies. Being certified and recognized are the key.  

This may be a good opportunity to balance the budget. How? Neil Armstrong, the American astronaut, was the first man to step foot on the moon back in 1969. No matter what any conspiracy theorists say, it did not happen on a movie lot in Hollywood. We were really there and they left the rubbish to prove it. I figure that gives us the right to name our spinning rock.

Let’s sell the naming rights to the moon and each of its phases.

Just imagine you and a date sitting in lover’s lane gazing at a full moon and saying “Wow honey, look at the Exxon-Mobil moon; it’s gorgeous tonight.

Pillsbury Crescent Rolls would be a natural sponsor for the crescent moon. Moon Pies? There’s another!  By the way, what name do we call our Sun? I can see the dollar signs in the politician’s eyes now.

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