Financial news and opinion website 24/7 Wall St. says Miami is the worst city in America in which to live. Worse than Detroit or Paterson, N.J. Bam! So we have traffic, some pythons and a little ‘sea rise’ on Miami Beach. So what!

Hey America, are you jealous of our sunshine and party-going culture? What is there about beaches and rich, beautiful bodies that makes you slam us that way? Don’t we acknowledge you with a quick glance in the elevator on our way to the spa?

Lately we’ve been called many nasty things, but worse than Detroit? That’s a new low. Forty-eight hours after processing that tidbit we enjoyed another drink and rejected the criticism. We then woke up from an all-nighter of dancing and prancing on South Beach to find Travel and Leisure Magazine, our go-to tome in the waiting room of our favorite plastic surgeon for our annual butt lift assessment to find it released its annual poll of regular travelers.

Miami came in at No. 1 on the list of “15 rudest cities in America”.

Rude? What is there about muscling to the head of a line, any line, just because we’re good looking? We wrote the book on ‘line jumping’. We cut our teeth as ‘lane jumpers’ into the HOV lane on I-95. Just wait there in line at the restaurant or club. It’s a good vantage point as you look at us. Wasn’t one of the reasons you came here for a quick getaway was to look at us?

Anyway, if you’re too busy reading surveys, you may not have read about Brexit, Britain’s exit from the European Union. What’s a ‘brexit’? Where’s Britain? What’s a union? Doesn’t matter! Keep dissing us and we’ll start thinking about ‘Flexit’ and I’m not talking muscles here, although part of our charm is beautiful well sculpted, if vacuous, people. If you keep spurning us, Flexit could be the South Florida exit from the rest of the country. You can keep Disney-World and the other ‘family’ destinations. We’ve got better lines to jump.

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