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Published: April 13 2012

Buzz Fleischman - Columnist Page. North Korea shocks world with creative 'engine' for rocket

The world's largest rubber band has been confirmed by Guinness Book of Records and Ripley's 'Believe it or Not'.

The immense rubber band made of hundreds of thousands of donated hair ties from North Korean teen age girls will be utilized to propel a satellite carrying Unha-3 rocket from the launch pad near Pyongyang into what they hope will be space.

As North Korea's young leader, Kim Jong Un added the title of 'Supreme Ruler of the Universe' to his long list of titles, he ceremoniously twisted the rubber band in preparation for the rocket launch to help celebrate the 100th anniversary of the birth of Kim Il Sung, the founder of North Korea and the younger Kim's high school graduation which he felt was never really publicized to his satisfaction.

This first ever rocket launch will carry a satellite that transmits a list of every one of his titles over and over to the literally dozens of still working radio receivers in the electricity deprived country.

The rocket fuel, produced from Kimchi, the national dish, which has been fermenting in earthenware pots buried in the mountainous region all winter, has been termed ' truly delicious' by the ruling worker's party. "If there's any left, we'll distribute it to needy families, if any admit they're hungry which they're not".

Paek Chang Ho, chief of the command center where the rocket is currently under a surplus army tarp to protect it from the elements, said "It's ready to go when we get the green light from the engineers". He added, "A green light has been ordered from Amazon.com and we asked them to ship third day air".

The U.N. Security Council has condemned the use of rubber bands as missile propellants.

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